I sometimes catch myself getting annoyed when someone (ahem…social media influencers) won’t give me the practical advice they know I’m looking for. For example, one of my favorite influencers was giving parenting advice the other day on “strong-willed” children. She mentioned finding things to “say yes” with them on, because you don’t want to crush their spirit or confidence. Many parents kept asking her for a list of practical ways to say yes to their kids.
She didn’t give one.
I am not far enough along in my motherhood journey to have experienced strong-willed children, but I have been in the boat of wanting more practical advice, or a step-by-step list from influencers that are wiser than me. And I have been slightly annoyed, or inconvenienced in the past when they have refused. (How dare they not take the time out of their extremely busy schedule to answer my every question.)
But the more I think about it, the more convicted I am about that type of entitled attitude. By putting myself in the shoes of those influencers, I have concluded that:
Answering every follower’s questions for a list of practical advice would take forever. Time that can be better spent with family.
Any suggestions that someone makes might work for their family, but it’s not guaranteed that they’ll work for yours.
When we get extremely specific practical advice like that, we are missing an opportunity to pray about it and let the Lord direct our steps; “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not rely on your own understanding; in all your ways know him, and he will make your paths straight,” (Proverbs 3:5-6 CRB)
If we were to get a step-by-step guide on how to run our family from someone, we would no longer have to rely on God for those answers; and something seems weird about that picture. I’m not saying all advice is wrong or bad. Sometimes it’s wonderful to receive advice from fellow mamas and older, wiser people that have been through the seasons that we’re going through. But we shouldn’t be relying on influencers or humans for all of our answers.
So, if you’re wishing that a certain influencer would guide you a little more specifically, or getting annoyed with someone for not giving you the “right” advice, just remember where the best advice comes from.
God has given us the tools we need to figure out what works for our families. Be encouraged and empowered in your role as a mama by the reminder that God will give you the wisdom you need to run your family the way he has designed.
“Now if any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God–who gives to all generously and ungrudgingly–and it will be given to him.” –James 1:5
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